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What’s the hardest thing you ever had to say to someone?

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level 1

Had to tell my mom that my brother died. I was his emergency contact at the hospital. Called her at 2am to tell her and she was oddly calm. About 5 min later she called me back asking “ did you just tell me that jimmy died?. I think I had a terrible dream.” I had to tell her twice.

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level 1
4.6k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago
x3x5x2

Fuck I really don’t want to tell this story it makes me cry every time I tell it. I’ll change some info for obvious reasons..

So I’m a Police Officer and I get a call to go to a house and meet with a father who states that his daughter, aged 12, wants to commit suicide. My first thought is what 12 yr old knows what suicide is?

Dad is crying and explains that his wife died and he has sole custody of his daughter. He moved back in with his parents after his wife passed away a few years earlier. They provided support for him, low rent, free sitting, etc. He sends me upstairs.

I am met by this small blonde 12 yr old girl who’s room is in the attic. She has a mattress, a bureau, a skateboard and song lyric written all over the walls and ceiling.

She won’t talk to me. I mean why would she? I’m 6’1” 235 lbs and blocking her doorway. I ask her if I can have a seat. I want to give her some power so she feels some measure of control. She says yes. Instead of sitting in a chair or on the mattress I sat on the floor. She is instantly a little taller than me now. I saw her shoulders relax.

I see the lyrics from Wait and Bleed by Slipknot on the wall so I bring it up. She looks at me as if to suggest how the hell do you know that. Then I comment on the trucks on her skateboard. I had a pal that owned a skate shop so I knew a tiny bit.

After that she started talking and the tears flowed from this little girl. Almost upon just moving into the house dad had to work crazy hours to make ends meet. Her Grandmother would pick her up from the bus stop and then she’d stay with them each day until after dinner.

She says “My grandfather makes me have sex with him. Everyday.” I’m crushed! She says “my grandmother sometimes holds me down.” “They warned me not to say anything, but I can’t tell my dad.” “I just want to die.”

I begin to tell her that it’s not her fault, that her grandparents are clearly sick. That if she can’t tell dad, that I can, and I can make her grandparents go away.

The hardest thing I ever had to do was walk downstairs and tell that poor man that his father and mother had been raping his baby girl for years.

He had three sisters that upon turning 18 they all left the state. He hadn’t spoken to them or seen them in years. He contacted them immediately and learned that his father had raped all three of his sisters as well. I physically had to hold him up at this point.

I contacted my Sgt. and another officer and we were able to make the arrests. This state is different now and we don’t get to lock someone up right away like that anymore. Of course I’m shortening the investigation for the sake of the readers.

Grandfather is still in jail, Grandma died almost immediately after her release. I begged dad to get her and himself in to therapy ASAP.

Fast forward five years and I get a call at the station from dad. “Hey can you come by the house?” My first question is “Is she ok?” He says be here around 4:30pm.

I arrive and dad shakes my hand and pulls me in for a hug. He yells upstairs to his little girl that I am there (he calls me by my name). I hear hurried footsteps and I am witness to an Angel in flight. This little girl is now seventeen and in a sunflower yellow dress comes flying down the stairs and gives me to best hug I’ve ever had. She is going to her senior prom! (And yes I’m crying as I write this).

I met her date, talked to her, and got closure on this initially horrific story. I said my goodbyes then. I’ve never seen or heard from her again but I’ll never forget her as long as I live.

Thank you for reading this.

Edit: I fell asleep for a bit and woke to find that a one of you had given me a Gold and even a Platinum, both my first. In fact to be honest I’ve no idea what they do, but it meant that her story touched your hearts and that is more than enough flair for me. Thank you truly.

Edit 2: Wow this blew up. I’ve received some DM’s with kind words and I’ve read every reply. I wish I could help every person that’s gone through this. If you’ve been abused I’m sorry that you went through that but it wasn’t your fault it was the abusers. If your support system or lack of one contributed to your situation getting worse than I am truly sorry.

level 2
788 points · 10 days ago

That girl is alive because of you, my dude. You carry that sunshine as proudly as you can. You deserve it.

level 2

That’s the one story always to remember, always to tell. Being big and strong is not always best but being there for someone and get them to trust you. You’re wonderful person for that action alone.

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level 1
6.8k points · 11 days ago

Had to interrupt my older brother playing video games to tell him my younger brother had been shot twice.

level 2
1.1k points · 10 days ago

Oh geeze that brought back a memory that I think I had kinda semi repressed but now it's coming back quite vividly.

I was only about 12 years old. My little brother was 10. Our mother had been sick for a while so we were at home alone quite a bit. We woke up early on a saturday and ate our cocoa pops for breakfast and we were the only ones home. We were playing some Simpsons Hit & Run on the OG Xbox, and I had the controller at that point.

My dad and one of my mum's friends walked in the front door and walked over to us. My mum's friend kneeled down and told us that our mother had just died.

I just kept playing the game, man. I didn't know how to process that. They had to take the controller off me eventually because I would have probably just kept playing until my body forced me to sleep.

level 3
433 points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Fuck this reminds me of my least favorite memory. My Grandma used to sort of take care of me when my parents were going through shit, and I remember her last phone call to me. I was 6 years old, and She called to tell me it would be the last time she talked to me she told me she loved me, and talked to me for a few minutes. I gave the phone back to my dad, and went back into the living room to play NCAA football 2004 with my dads friend who was in town helping out. I forgot to tell my grandma I loved her, and I didn’t realize what was going on until I saw her in her casket. Sometimes I hate myself for that, but I probably shouldn’t.

Edit: I just want to say that you people are very nice and my eyes are a bit swollen from thinking about this stuff and reading your stories, but my day is much better. I love all of you and want you all to be happy, whatever it takes.

level 4

Of course you shouldn't hate yourself. You were 6 and no 6 year old is emotionally capable of processing that. Your grandma clearly loved you dearly. I bet it would make her very sad to know you felt bad for even a second. Imagine her hugging you every time your brain goes there.

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level 1
1.2k points · 11 days ago

“I’m doing everything I can, Sir.”

I work at a gun range. Almost 21 weeks ago, we had a guy commit suicide in front of his dad. As soon as I knew, I sprinted downstairs and started doing what I knew to do (I know basic first aid and my brain is pretty quick in high pressure) immediately. Apply pressure to the wounds (it was through and through his head) and keep him from choking on his blood. The absolute worst part was his dad sitting there, begging me to save him. I’m not a paramedic, but that’s all I could say. I didn’t even know what else to say. It’s not a moment where you can just talk. It’s hard to explain.

level 2
Original Poster191 points · 11 days ago

He shot him self at the gun range? Tough and sad situation for you and the dad.

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level 1

Not me but I had to watch my step-sister tell my step-mom that my dad was sending her very inappropriate text messages. I watched a daughter completely destroy her mother's world and have to still be there for her daughter.

A few days later my step-mom seemed to have blocked the whole thing out and essentially pick my dad over her daughter. That's when I realized I hate them. Even worse, I was the one who told her to rat on him.

level 2

My grandmother's husband repeatedly molested me when I was younger. I spoke up about it rather quickly but no one outside of my parents cared or believed me. People suck.

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level 2

Have you showed these texts to anyone? If he knows that mom doesn't care, he might not stop at texting. Get help.

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level 1

Calling my patient’s wife to tell her that he died. Her reply was heartbreaking; she asked if I could keep him there long enough for her to get their kids on the school bus.

level 2
4.3k points · 10 days ago

That is incredibly real. Life doesn't stop just because tragedy happens.

level 3

Yeah, that was the hardest part when my husband was ill. The world keeps going but your family feels like it is stuck at one point and can't catch up.

level 4
2.1k points · 10 days ago
x2

The world keeps going but your family feels like it is stuck at one point and can't catch up.

Yes, and you look around wondering how everyone can act so normal, like aren't they aware the world just changed? A world just ended, a universe exploded, everything is permanently altered, and they're just going on with their lives. Didn't they feel the change, the ripple in the universe? It is a surreal experience.

level 5

This poem by Auden describes perfectly how it feels when somebody close to you dies:

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone, Prevent the dog from barking with the juicy bone. Silence the pianos and, with muffled drum, Bring out the coffin. Let the mourners come. Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead Scribbling in the sky the message: “He is dead!” Put crepe bows around the white necks of the public doves. Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

He was my north, my south, my east and west, My working week and Sunday rest, My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song. I thought that love would last forever; I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now; put out every one. Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun. Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood. For nothing now can ever come to any good.

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level 1
15.8k points · 10 days ago
x4x5

I took it upon myself to inform our circle of friends fairly early in the morning that our good friend had decided to take his life the night before - just a few days before Christmas. I was his best friend, and his parents obviously didn’t have any ways of contacting most of the group. His mom actually ended up calling my wife to break the news.

So it was basically a few hours of calling, breaking the news, having a good cry, composing myself, making the next call, etc.

As terrible as that was, I still can’t even imagine what his parents had to go through. Take my sorrow and pain and multiply that by infinity, I suppose.

Four years later, the crew still organizes a dinner with his parents every three months or so. They may have lost a son, but they inherited ten children and a few grandchildren.

They’re stuck with us now.

level 2

That last bit makes the rest of it less painful to read, his parents are lucky to have all of you

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level 2
219 points · 10 days ago

That’s beautiful. I am so sorry for your loss. Thanks for being there for his parents.

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level 1

Here I am afraid to tell my mom that I want to change my major.

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level 1

Had to tell my mom and siblings that dad died.

level 2

Since my dad (for obvious reasons) couldn't, I had to call family and friends (many many calls) and tell them about my mom's leukemia diagnosis.

A year and a month later, I had to make those same calls to tell everyone she had passed.

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level 1
10.7k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

I'm a physician. Told a 33 year old she had metastatic breast cancer. Recently divorced, single mother of 3, supporting 3 elderly adults in her home...on Thanksgiving day. It was ultra aggressive, she died 2 months later.


Edit: to flesh out some detail, as I've gotten several responses. I was a family medicine resident at the time, and our clinic provided care exclusively to the underserved, impoverished, or otherwise needy population. The clinic remained staffed during holidays by a skeleton crew for urgent care-type issues, and she came in with the CD from the hospital. She had gone to the ED with worsening abdominal pain for several weeks. They CT scanned her, showing multiple "spots" in her liver. She'd had a CT scan 3 months prior during an episode of appendicitis, and in the interval period her liver went from spotless to a mass of tumors. The ED doc, though unconventional, ordered a chest CT which showed a large, spiculated mass in the breast with diffuse enlargement of all surrounding lymph nodes. But for a person this young (and without family history of cancer) to present with such wide-spread and rapid-growing disease meant her prognosis was dismal. She obviously chose to bear the full scope of therapy, but that point it was throwing buckets of water at a forest fire.

level 2

I feel like this thread is just getting worse and worse the further I scroll.

level 3
811 points · 10 days ago

This is the first one I read and idk if I wanna keep reading

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level 1
1.7k points · 11 days ago

Telling my family, friends and coworkers that I have cancer... and then again the following year when it came back.

Telling people horrible news over and over never gets easy.

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level 1

I had to call my Dad to let him know his mother had passed. My parents were on a cruise ship at the time.

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level 1
17.1k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago
x2x4

Not telling my brother he had brain cancer. Telling him to focus on getting better and he would come live with my parents soon.

He lost his short term memory 2 days after they found the tumor. Had brain surgery. We didn't want him to suffer telling over and over as he would forget.

My parents took his ashes and kept them at home for months. She wanted to keep her promise that he would come live with them.

Sorry, still pretty broken over it.

edit thank you for the gold. I know it's a pretty horrifying story. The support is much appreciated.

level 2
1.4k points · 10 days ago

You absolutely did the right thing. I know it's not the same, but my nanna has vascular dementia and keeps asking when she's going home, even after we explain that she's in a nursing home. Instead of making your brother and yourselves upset and argue every time, you saved him a lot of heart ache, even if he wouldn't have remembered it.

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level 1

Grandpa you need to say goodnight and goodbye to Grandma, she’s not going to make it through the night.

level 2
1.7k points · 10 days ago

That's a one sentence horror story

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level 1

I just said good bye to my grandma 2 days ago. I hope she passes soon. She deserves to be in peace.

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level 1
11.6k points · 11 days ago

Telling my best mate that his gf cheated on him with heaps of guys while he was away.

Then years later telling the same mate that his fiance was trying to cheat on him... with me. I said no, of course, but he got back with her, married her, and now he doesn't talk to me.

level 2

You did the right things man. That sucks though :( I can't imagine what makes someone abandon the actual trustworthy person.

level 3

She was probably able to convince him that he was lying. Or spin it that he came on to her.

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level 1
9.8k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago
x3x2

I told my grandfather that the surgery he was scheduled to have in less than two hours, which was necessary to save his life, was going to leave him unable to take anything by mouth ever again- even water; and leave him hooked to an IV pretty much permanently. Being a fiercely independent person, he of course refused to move forward with the surgery (which he had previously agreed to, not knowing this). Then I had to inform my family that I had told him the truth, against their wishes, and that he had decided against the surgery.

It was the worst day of my life. I did what was right, even though it meant he would leave us within weeks, and I don't regret it, but ...damn. I still cry when I think about it.

Edit: WOW. I never imagined this would blow up the way it has. Thank you all so so much for all of your kind words, gold, and silver. It means so much to me. I am in tears, and very humbled.

My grandfather had a tremendous amount of integrity and love for his family. He was a WWII veteran who never once backed down from a challenge or took the easy path over the right one. His presence in my life was a gift unlike any other. I still miss him every single day.

To answer a frequent question- I don’t know how thoroughly the surgery was explained to him or how much he understood (he was sedated heavily) when he agreed to it. He was being put on Central Venous Nutrition- the surgery was to install a port for feeding him via IV. He wouldn’t have been able to go home without 24 hour care and would have been restricted from all oral intake, (due to reflux causing recurring aspiration pneumonia) and left more or less permanently hooked up to tubes.

When I told him, he cried and apologized to me over and over. It was heartbreaking. I knew that he would have done the same for me though. Thank you all for affirmation that I did the right thing for him in his final days. It really means a lot.

level 2

Don't feel badly, my great-grandmother was diagnosed with cancer that went to her brain but her kids thought it would be better if she didn't know so she didn't spend her last days in fear. She was on morphine but she didn't know that's what it was just her daily pill. One day I visited and while everyone was gone she asked what was wrong with her. She knew something was up but not what. I was pissed that no one told her when she obviously had her facilities about her, so I told her, gently and with love. She was very accepting and calm about it. She died a few days later and she was happier than she had been in a while.

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level 2
3.9k points · 10 days ago

You completely did the right thing. I would want to be told the truth in a situation like this.

level 3

Same. It's hard but not everyone is willing to have life over living.

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level 1
6.4k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Created a account just to post, long time listener first time caller.

I was asked to co-coach a competitive traveling baseball team of 10 year old boys (my son included) We had a try-out and would have to cut about 7 boys. I saw right away that my son would not be on the team unless I was the coach. We had 2 days of try-outs and after the first day my son gets in the truck and tells me that it was the most fun he has ever had playing baseball and he can't wait to spend the summer hanging out with his friends and me. I had to tell my son right then and there, with all the hope and excitement in his eyes that he was not good enough to play on the team. It was the right thing to do but that didn't make me or him feel any better. Cutting your own kid from the team you are supposed to coach makes you feel like a dick head. I resigned as coach and spent that summer practicing (his request) every day after work. The next year he made the team, was selected as an All-Star of the league and led his team in batting. I'll never forget that day in my truck as long as I live. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Edit - wow! What an awesome community reddit is!! I've read the nice things about 100 times, I want to send you guys all Christmas cards for the nice kind words you took the time out of your day to write. Thank you!!

level 2

You taught him an important lesson for life that day, and quite possibly you two bonded more that summer than you would have otherwise. Good parenting man!!

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level 1

"Goodbye. Thank you for everything, I love you Dad". As I sat holding my dying father last year as he bled out and died right before Christmas. When there is literally not a thing you can do, it hits you hard. I like to think he heard me but in reality... I know he didn't.

Also doing his eulogy in front of an entire town packed into a small hall. Guy was a legend, and he deserved so much more. Probably the hardest thing I've ever said or done.

Call your parents, tell them you love them. Everyday

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level 1
255 points · 11 days ago

I found my mother dead. I had to break the news to my then 12 year old brother. I gave him the worst news of his life. I watched him crumble right in front of me. That messed with me for a very long time.

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level 1

To my 16 year old- "your dad just died".

level 2
9.8k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

I had to do this with my 6 and 5 year olds when their dad committed suicide earlier this year. Heartwrenching doesn't even begin to describe it.

Edit: I'm sorry that so many are able to relate to my comment. I hope all of you are able to find peace. Also thanks to whoever gilded me. I do wish it was under better circumstances, but thanks all the same.

level 3
2.5k points · 10 days ago

That's awful. I hope you and your kids are doing okay. I can't imagine having to go through that.

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level 1

With my then-gf (now wife), I had to explain to our 5yo kid that he was very, very ill, that his blood was making him poorly, and that the nice doctors were going to make him better but it would be hard work.

Leukemia fucking sucks

level 2

Man im so sorry that sounds horrible. I just watched a video of a kid on his youtube channel saying bye to his subscribers friends and family, and it was one of the hardest things ive ever watched. the kid def knew he wasn't going to make it but was stronger then ill ever be. hopefully everything turns out alright for you and your child.

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level 2

I’m curious how he is doing now?

level 3

Much better

level 4

I could hear the collective breath of relief

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level 2
Original Poster1.2k points · 11 days ago

Sorry you had to do that. No should have to go through that and say that stuff to their kid.

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level 1
6.8k points · 11 days ago

Had to tell my dad that I was moving thousands of miles away with my wife and daughter. I’m his only child which made my daughter his only grandchild.

level 2

You're not alone, man. I just had to tell my parents my family and I are moving 1700 miles away (well, we've already moved, but it was this summer). I have a sister, but she's not going to have any kids, and she already lives 350 miles away from them. I think my mom is taking it pretty hard. I moved a month after the rest of my family, and my mom actually gave me a hug, which she has RARELY done EVER, when I loaded up that last morning to finally head out.

Something that has helped has been video calls.

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level 1
20.6k points · 11 days ago

I had to tell a close family friend that their son had been hit by a car, and that it was bad, and they needed to go to the hospital immediately. He got airlifted.

He died later that night. He was like 12.

level 2
3.9k points · 11 days ago

Driving to work one night I had to take a side street because of a bunch of flashing lights blocking the road ahead. When I got in I went to the office to check in (doing rounds as security) and the acting supervisor was on the phone. He sounded pretty deflated, and when he got off told me this older gal who worked there would not be in that night as her son was just hit by a car and killed. Turns out that was the accident I had seen the aftermath of on my way in. The guy was in his early 20's, but still. His mom is a good friend, and I am still completely devastated for her.

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level 2
882 points · 11 days ago

How did you find out before they did?

Also, that really sucks.

level 3

They were my neighbor, and they happened to be out for the day. Another neighbor saw it happen but didn't know how to get in contact with them. They knew our families were close - my folks were actually out with the kid's folks that day. So they called my house, and I answered.

So I "got" to call them and break the news. My dad called me a handful of times with updates, none of them great.

Then I got the "it's probably over" call.

Then I got the "it is over" call.

It was an ugly couple of weeks.

level 4
519 points · 11 days ago

Man, that must've been horrible for everyone.

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level 1
5.5k points · 11 days ago

No, I don't love you.

level 2
2.9k points · 11 days ago

I had to tell this to the nicest girl I've ever known. She treated me amazingly, all around great person, but with an extremely grating personality. Tough stuff.

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level 1

I thought my mum knew that grandma had a heart attack, so I asked her how she is. Turns out mum didn’t know and I ended up telling her Grandma had a heart attack and had temporary paralysis.

All is good. Mum is back in our home country to check up on grandma.

level 2

glad everyone is doing alright now!

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level 1

I had to tell my mom that my boyfriend who I said was so awesome and loving, hit me

level 2
1.5k points · 11 days ago

I’m so sorry that happened to you, but it’s so good that you reached out and told someone

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level 1

Had to tell some friends and our coach that a girl on the team had killed herself. They asked if I knew where she was when she didn’t show up to practice and I just burst into tears.

level 2

My big brother passed away suddenly in 2011. My dad found him dead in his apartment. I had planned on going to his apt to see why nobody had heard from him and my dad decided he had better do it, then called me once he got there and had the police coming. Then I think the police called my mom. My older sister was set to go take a test she had been studying for a year for, and her acceptance into the Masters program she wanted was dependent upon her doing well. We found out about an hour before the test and decided we needed to wait the 4 hours until it was over.

I texted my sister and said hey come over to moms when you’re done. I could tell as she walked up to the house that she thought we were having a surprise party congratulating her on taking the test. I met her in the front yard and she asked what was wrong so I just said it and I think time froze for a minute for her. She went from so happy and excited to...yeah. Fucking sucked.

level 3
2.8k points · 10 days ago

Man, imagine going to your house thinking there a party planned for your success...

To only learn such dreadful news...

level 4
1.1k points · 10 days ago

Stories like that that really floor your meaning on this planet. Like.. no matter whats going on, good or bad, your world can be flipped 180° in a matter of seconds and theres really nothing you can do to prevent lifes tragedies.

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level 2

When I was in high school, a student in my band killed themselves. I’ll never forget the guidance counselors telling us, but damn, I never thought about it from their perspective. First 10 minutes of the school day, stand on a podium in front of dozens of high schoolers and tell them one of the people who should be here died yesterday...

level 3
2.1k points · 10 days ago

This exact thing happened during hs in band. The band director just stood up there and cried and told us that a kid had attempted suicide that morning. They later came over the intercom and announced that he had been pulled off of life support. The kid had a big personality and everyone knew him. It was tragic.

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level 1
3.2k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

"I don't love you anymore" to an insanely abusive person. Got the shit beat out of me for it and took weeks to recover, but after three years of trying to find a way out, I finally did.

Edit: Thanks so much for your responses (and my first gold), everyone! I greatly appreciate it and if you're ever in a similar situation, my inbox is always open. ♡

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level 1
14.1k points · 10 days ago

ME ON PHONE TO BEST FRIEND IN ANOTHER CITY: Shawn, you okay? Have you heard?

BEST FRIEND: Huh,what's up?

ME: Your brother is in jail...

BEST FRIEND: what now, what's the bail?

ME: No bail, Its all over the local news, he beat his girlfriends 4 year old to death.

level 2

Jesus man, how the hell does someone even do that? Like you have no humanity whatsoever to beat a 4 year old to death.

level 3
4.1k points · 10 days ago

It was described in court as a drugged out, slow, rough house-esque kind of slow beating over 12ish hours.

So picture, tossing, pushing, slapping, kicking over hours and hours rather than a brutal beating over minutes.

level 4
3.6k points · 10 days ago

That's fucking awful. I'm getting off reddit now to go hug my four year old.

level 5

I’m going to go find a four year old to hug

level 6
1.8k points · 10 days ago
x2

"Your honor, I was at the playground because I'd just read about a man beating a 4 year old to death, and I decided I needed one."

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level 3

I had to sit in court and hear about a guy who forcible held a toddler under super hot water. The pictures of that kid that were shown are scarred into my brain for life. There is just something wrong with some people.

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level 1

Some wise redditor once posted, “Your success in life will be directly proportional to your willingness to have uncomfortable discussions.”

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level 1

Had to tell a friend she talks too much.

She's genuinely a good person so it hurt but she literally can't have silence at any time..

We can't just sit and enjoy something, she has to be talking. The minute someone has silence longer than a second she's talking about her job or what her mom had for lunch.

It's a constant stream of consciousness that never ends.

A movie? She's talking about what just happened on screen like she's the narrator.

Friend comes over who I haven't seen in years? She was talking over our whole greeting.

It's time to go? She doesn't get the hint and just...keeps...talking.

She asked me why people seem to only hang out with her once and then stop...why her bf was distant.

So I told her it's probably the amount she speaks. I asked her why she feels that it's weird to have silence.

She just said it made her feel uneasy when people weren't talking.

I told her it's worse to talk when you don't have anything to contribute to the conversation, and it's okay to have silence every once in awhile.

She's gotten better and thanked me because no one else had the heart to tell her

level 2
769 points · 10 days ago

I have ADHD and even I know I’m annoying. I can’t stop talking even though I know I’m not contributing anything to the conversation so I know what your friend feels like

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level 1
23.5k points · 11 days ago

Having to tell my exes daughter that me and her father were breaking up. She was already showing signs of abandonment from her mother. She was extra clingy the rest of the day. I miss her so much.

level 2
5.3k points · 10 days ago

If you and the father are still on good terms, you might be able to still visit occasionally in more of an "aunt" capacity. Take her for an afternoon for some girl time, go to the movies, have a meal together, that sort of thing.

level 3
5.5k points · 10 days ago

That was the orginal plan. Unfortunately life didn't work out that way.

level 4

I’m going through something similar. My gf has two boys. We took to each other like pb and j. Did not work out with mom. After 14 months, we are done.

I think staying in touch with her boys will ultimately cause more of a distraction. I told them I love them and they can contact me anytime. Pretty much all you can do.

level 5
2.8k points · 10 days ago
x2

My mom used to have a boyfriend that I got along with like a best friend. I was the closet thing he has ever had to a son. After they broke up I didn't see him for a long time but now that I'm older (20) I've reconnected with him and we get dinner at least once a month.

I hope you can reconnect with them someday.

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level 1
2.7k points · 11 days ago

Three things:

Had to tell my dad his dad died.

Had to tell my dad his best friend died.

Had to tell my ex that I just don't love him anymore. He cried for 3 hours straight and didn't want to let me go.

level 2
1.7k points · 11 days ago

I had to tell my dad his wife (mom) died after he just got out of emergency surgery where we thought he might die but instead she passed

We had to wait a couple days so as not to stress him out. Ill never forget watching a man who never cried start blubbering. Didnt matter in the end, he died days later from a stroke.

Theyd been married 36 years at that point. Probably couldnt or didnt want to live without her.

level 3
956 points · 11 days ago

That's it, done with this thread

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level 1
6.2k points · 11 days ago

Trying to tell my taxi driver in Korea where to go. He spoke 0 English while I speak 0 Korean. 10 minutes of trying to show him maps on my phone and attempting to use Google translate until I found someone on the street who could translate.

I have had some horrible emotional conversations, but this takes the cake for most difficult as I literally could not say what I needed to for him to understand.

level 2
3.0k points · 11 days ago

I like this one. Cabs in Asia are really difficult because the slightest difference can mean a huge difference. You can't assume saying the name of your hotel will help either, because they just don't have those noises.

When I was in Korea, I had to ask my friend why cabbies couldn't understand the name of my hotel.

HIM: Yeah, you have to say it phonetically. Like "BITZ-uh KAL-uh-tun"
ME: That sounds super racist. Are you sure?

Later:
ME: Ritz Carlton, kamsamnida
CABBIE: *blank stare*
ME: BITZ-uh KAL-uh-tun?
CABBIE: Ah! Bitz-uh-kalutun! Gwaenchanh-ayo!

Luckily, in my experience, cabbies mostly want to help you get where you're going. Except in Thailand.

level 3
1.3k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Yeah, this is a common misunderstanding. With Konglish, it feels as if you're mocking the person by mimicking their accent, when in reality, the language is just structured in a fundamentally different way than English. In Korean, each syllable is enunciated separately, while in English we tend to blend them together and only stress one or two syllables per word.

Edit: Spoken Korean and Konglish make a TON more sense when you know the Korean alphabet. Since its nearly perfectly phonetic, it's actually really easy to learn!

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level 1
6.7k points · 11 days ago

In a departure from all of the illness, injury, and death, I'm going to go work related.

My first time disciplining an employee was rough. He was in the wrong, violating my policy, and doing so publicly. I, of course, wrote him up and delivered the reprimand privately. It didn't help that he's 20 years older than me, either.

level 2
1.7k points · 11 days ago

I've had to reprimand employees twice my age who've been with the company longer than me. Holy shit do they not appreciate my criticism.

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level 2

I’ve owned my own businesses for 30 years. It’s never gotten easier to fire someone.

level 3
1.3k points · 11 days ago

Especially when you know them personally, and they have a family.

level 4

Exactly.

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level 1
9.7k points · 11 days ago

A friend and I were going through divorces at the exact same time. Both of our divorces were hard and rough, but hers was a bit uglier, and it came out that her ex-husband was cheating on her and was flaunting his new girlfriend all over the place.

After a couple of months of listening to my friend go mental over the new girl, how her ex was scum, how he was manipulating her kids, and how she knew all of this because she was facebook stalking the new girlfriend.

I had to have a long, sit down talk with her and get her to realize that facebook stalking her ex & his new squeeze was really - really - REALLY not healthy and not helping her heal from the whole divorce.

Apparently I was the only one who ever told her to just fucking stop it.

level 2

This is what friends are for

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level 1
9.6k points · 11 days ago

it is 2015. had a really bad fight with my parents who live in Romania (i am state-side) and havent spoken for 3 months. then i had a really bad accident and was in a coma for 9 days. i had to tell my mom i am sorry and i was asleep for some days. god bless

level 2
Original Poster4.4k points · 11 days ago

Damn a coma for 9 days. When you’re in a coma, is it just like you’re sleeping or do you feel different in a coma?

level 3
5.3k points · 11 days ago

It's like sleeping but you are restless. You only figure it out after you wake up. A nurse was checking on me when I woke up and she sad I woke up crying and I couldn't move my fingers. Cant remember the moment i woke up nor the next 4-5 hours. Its odd. Its like a missing piece from time and all of a sudden from one point everything is back to normal. Dont wish that to anybody

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level 1
4.9k points · 11 days ago

Having to drive to my sister's house with my Mom to let her know Dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Those screams are something I don't ever want to hear again.

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level 1
20.7k points · 11 days ago · edited 10 days ago

I had to tell my sister that our dad had killed himself.

Edit: Thanks for the positive vibes everyone! We are doing well. Its something you never really get over, but you learn to cope. I hope everyone that has gone through a similar situation finds the strength to get through it.

level 2
4.6k points · 11 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Similarly, I had to tell my sister over the phone that my dad had passed away.

You know how certain phrases / sounds / whatever get kinda permanently etched into your brain? I'll never forget the horrific fucking cry/scream she made after I said those words.

Hug. Hope you're doing OK these days.

Edit: PS, you're all confirming my conviction that people who experience loss like this ultimately end up being better people for it. Empathy is what makes this world a beautiful place, so thanks for all your stories and kind messages.

level 3

Yeah. I was next to my husband when he heard, over the phone, his father had passed.

That scream, i will never forget. Never.

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level 3
981 points · 10 days ago

I turned 30 this year, I've got a few of those etched in to my brain. I won't ever forget how my dad told me my brother passed away. Hugs all around

level 4

"We lost him."

That's exactly how my mom told me my brother had died. I remember exactly where I was standing in our house, and her exact tone of voice when she said it over the phone.

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level 3

I had to tell my two oldest children (6 and 5 at the time) that their dad killed himself. That was absolutely the hardest thing I ever had to do. I will never forget their cries no matter how badly I'd like to.

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level 1
8.1k points · 11 days ago
x4

Trying to repeat what a Welsh person says in Welsh.

level 2

Llanfair­pwllgwyngyll­gogery­chwyrn­drobwll­llan­tysilio­gogo­goch

level 3
557 points · 10 days ago

Is that Welsh for "cat walking across a keyboard?"

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level 1
22.6k points · 11 days ago

Geez man, so many sad stories in here and I thought me having to tell an employee that they had bad BO was bad. Guess mine is a lot lighter than most.

level 2
4.5k points · 11 days ago

I’ve had to do that too. Oddly more difficult than I thought it’d be.

level 3
2.0k points · 11 days ago

was it because the BO causing you to not stand close enough to have a serious conversation?

level 4

[On Loudspeaker] "Jimmy, you smell bad and should feel bad"

[After Hanging Up] "Whew, that was one of the hardest things I've ever said."

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level 4
261 points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Hey, Tony!

Yeah?

You stink!

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level 2

I used to work with a really weird guy who always smelled terrible. One day I somehow drew the short straw and had to be the one to tell him. This is how the conversation went. “Hey man I’m sorry but people are complaining about your body oder, could you just try and either take a shower before work or use some extra deodorant before work?” Then he responds, “No, I shower once a week and use dog shampoo it is actually better for your hair and skin to shower less and use dog shampoo, and deodorant has aluminum in it and causes cancer so I won’t use it and neither should you.” Then he walked away. We ended up just moving him to a work area that was a little further away from people. It was hard to get reliable employees there and he may have been the weirdest guy I’ve ever met but he was reliable. On a side note this dude had small jars with bugs he caught on his desk, and claimed to still have the placenta from his sons birth in a jar in his fridge.

level 3

Son? Somebody had sex with this guy?

level 4

Yes. I met his wife once. Both her and him were very large people. He claimed he was still deciding if he wanted to give the placenta to his son on his 16th birthday or bury it in the backyard. I strongly suggested he should bury it. I have plenty more stories about this dude too.

level 5

I need them all

level 6
2.0k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago
x2

I’ll give you a few. If someone sees this and worked where I used to work they could easily figure out who I’m talking about and who I am but whatever.
1)We had to wear smocks to handle circuit boards so we didn’t shock them. The smocks were translucent and he decided it was too hot, so he decided to wear crocs, shorts and the smock nothing else. His nipple rings were very easy to see along with most of the rest of his 300lb torso. The manager made him put on a shirt but not before this guy let us know if we thought his nipple piercings were weird we would have really thought his 3 piercings that made a “freedom ladder” down south was weird.
2) his wife was the bread winner so he eventually changed his schedule so he only worked part time. However he was still at work full time but only to play Magic the Gathering in the lunchroom with anyone who would play with him. 3)his van was full of magic the gathering cards, by full I mean he had cardboard blocking the cards from spilling out when he opened the side doors. It was like a foot deep and the seats had cardboard boxes filled with more cards.
4) he wanted to redo his bathroom so he tore everything out, then realized he had no idea how to remodel a bathroom because he said, “only his wife knew how to use the drill” he said he would just let her fix it.
5) he has 8 cats that he does have a litter box for but admitted that he probably only scoops it once a week and it smelled so he put it in the bathroom that he ripped apart.
6) he claimed to be offer a six figure job in Saudi Arabia but read reviews about where he would be working and he would basically have to stay on the compound and not leave to be safe.
7) he would collect cicada shells (or whatever the sheddings are called) on his smock. Like he would hook them onto his smock where you would put a name tag and everyday he would have a few more.
8) he trained his son to lock all the doors and hide when he told him zombies were coming and told him not to let anyone in because they might be zombies. This resulted in him being locked out of his house when he told his son there were zombies while walking to the door, and his son beat him inside and would not unlock the door. The cops had to be called to unlock the house.

There are more but I’m a little fuzzy on the details because it’s been a while since I’ve worked with him. I might text my friend who still works there and see if this guy is still there.

EDIT: I just remembered another thing he would do. We worked spraying a coating on circuit boards to weather proof them. We were given full respiratory masks so we wouldn’t breathe it in. He would take off his mask whenever managers were not around because he “liked the way the chemicals made him feel” and wasn’t worried about the health effects because he was 300lbs, smoked and was 50 years old.

Edit2: he claimed he was not addicted to cigarettes but had an oral fixation and like the way they felt in his mouth. I asked why he just didn’t light them then and he said then his wife would stop giving him money for them because that would be wasting them. Also, not super surprisingly he would wear the same clothes a multiple days in a row, and me and my coworkers started charting to see how long he would go with the same clothes. The record was 15 days with the same shirt. Now we didn’t know for sure if he washed it on the weekend but I doubt it.

Edit3: just remembered he frequently would eat 3 Big Macs for lunch all the time, but when there was a deal on nuggets he would just buy ungodly amount of nuggets. One day he told us he at a Big Mac for breakfast, then had three for lunch and said he was going to pick up 3 more for dinner on his way home.

Edit4: just to answer a few common questions. His name was not Kevin. He was never fired because he was actually reliable and not bad at his job. He was definitely the weirdest guy there but not at all the worst worker.
There was a group of about 10 guys who played magic together at lunch. They were all normal people who didn’t smell for the most part. This guy was the best though and the others would brag about it when they would finally beat him.
I don’t know if he was hiding his magic cards from his wife in the van, but he never seemed like the kind of guy to hide anything from anyone.

Edit5: He has a degree in entomology. He claimed he used to work for the CDC and liked to let us know that using mosquitoes to purposely spread disease would be a super easy thing to do.

level 7
906 points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Sooo...breathing in circuit board spray coating was fine according to him...but the chemicals in shampoo and soap is what this dude was worried about?

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level 7
1.0k points · 10 days ago

You really fucking delivered there

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level 7

I need Jesus wow

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level 1
22.1k points · 11 days ago

Was part of a friend group that was spread all over the country. At nineteen, one of our friends got hit by a car. My ex lived in the same city and knew I knew her, so he called to let me know. Had to call up the rest of the group. One friend just burst out crying on the phone the second I told her. A guy legit could not understand what I said - it was like there was a barrier that simply would not let him hear that she was dead.


level 2
13.5k points · 11 days ago

I was that last guy once.

"Jimmy died"

"No he didn't, I saw him an hour ago."

Back and forth for a bit. Your guess is right my brain just refused to consider it.

level 3

A guy who we played D&D with died and the when someone else in the group called me to tell me, my reaction was like "wait what? When were you playing without me? What character is he going to build now. Yeah I know he died you already told me, just set him up with a new character. Wait, what?"

level 4
2.8k points · 10 days ago

Oh fuck man that's horrible.

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level 4
[deleted]
1.8k points · 10 days ago

As a DM, I would probably use a different way to say that if I was calling a D&D friend to tell them that one of our players had passed away. I frequently get messages that people on Neverwinter Nights died, I would be just as confused as you were if somebody said one of them died and meant in real life.

level 5
1.9k points · 10 days ago

"Jimmy can never come to D&D again"

"What?! Then he's dead to me!"

"Funny you should say that..."

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level 3
2.0k points · 10 days ago

Burned in my brain (and always makes me cry thinking about it) is the story a doctor once told on here. Woman in a Bad car wreck. Husband shows up to the ER. Doctor sadly tells the man, “I’m so sorry but your wife has passed away.” And then he sat there with a complete blank face and just said, “okay....... when can I take her home?”

level 4

When I was an EMT, we were trained to say "dead" or "died" rather than any dippy euphemism that could be misunderstood, like "passed away" or "passed on."

As I understood it, doctors were also trained to do this specifically to avoid just that type of misunderstanding, but maybe not everywhere.

level 5

It makes sense. It sounds harsh but ultimately is better because there’s no confusion and will probably help them start grasping it better. Another one people say that is a “dippy euphemism” is “she’s no longer with us” I have seen people say “so where is she”

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level 4

That is awful :(

level 5
307 points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

I know. It makes me overcome with the darkest and saddest feeling in the world because I imagine I would say the same thing if that same scenario happened with my wife. It just wouldn’t click in my brain

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level 3

Having been that person once, you’re right. There’s just a cloud of dismissal that washes over you and you feel like you’re on some weird tv show or something for a minute. There’s just no way it can be true. I was just out here on the porch with my buddy last night smoking a cigarette, laughing and talking about life and the future. That just happened, there’s no way he can be dead, life doesn’t work that way! Unfortunately, yes, sometimes it does. Life can be that fucked up.

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level 2

I had the exact same reaction when I was told my dad died. I kept repeating what but louder because I kept thinking it must be a sick joke

level 3

I also had this response when my dad died. Unfortunately it was following the death of my mother by only 3 months and I just thought, "there is no way this is happening to me." When I asked my aunt if she was kidding, she said, "What the fuck? Of course I'm not kidding you!"

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level 1
25.3k points · 11 days ago · edited 10 days ago

I had to wake my mom up and tell her that her husband and soulmate (/my dad) had died right next to her, while she was sleeping.


He was in hospice care, dying of cancer. She pulled up a cot next to his hospital bed on the side of him that she slept on at home. She fell asleep holding his hand, and he died with his hand still in hers.


Edit: No, dear reader, you are not crazy. I did indeed post this answer on a similar thread a few weeks back. I've not had to say anything more challenging than this in those past few weeks so I stuck with this answer.

level 2
5.4k points · 10 days ago

This makes me both happy and sad....

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level 2

That's super sad, but to be honest I can't think of a better way to go than to have someone who you love right there by your side. I've been fortunate that of the 5 or so major family members I've lost, 3 of them have been surrounded by family for their last days.

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level 1
21.3k points · 11 days ago
x2x2

"I'm not happy."

Breaking up with a terrible person is easy, breaking up with a good person is devastating.

level 2
6.7k points · 11 days ago

I think having to break up with someone truly good that I just did not love anymore was 10x worse than getting cheated on and dumped. And that really fucking sucked.

level 3

My girlfriend of five years has just told me she doesn't love me anymore. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to hear, we've just bought a house together and I even have a ring for her. I genuinely didn't expect it, I thought we were good :(

level 4
461 points · 10 days ago

The same thing happened to me a few months back man. My girlfriend came home from work, I was sitting on the couch browsing reddit, I said "Hi baby, how was work?". She said "We need to talk". I knew we had a little rough patch lately, but damn dude... She moved out the following week.

level 5
370 points · 10 days ago

We. Need. To. Talk.

Four words that nobody wants to hear.

level 6
126 points · 10 days ago

And my partner says it when he wants to decide what’s for dinner >:-(

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level 2
1.0k points · 10 days ago

I have to do this shortly. I don’t know how I’m going to.

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level 1
5.5k points · 11 days ago

The hardest was when, as a kid, I had to tell our neighbor that I had just seen his dog - a beautiful collie - hit and killed in the street by a truck speeding through the neighborhood.

As I've noted in askreddit some time ago, we both loved her. So it was heartbreaking to tell him - and to note that the driver just took off, leaving the collie dead in the roadway.

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level 1

I had to tell my older brother that our dad had died. What made it worse was the fact that the reason i had to tell him is that he was always my mom's favorite, and while she had no trouble telling me, she could not bring herself to tell him.

level 2

That's messed up.

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level 1
[deleted]
14.9k points · 11 days ago

Telling my parents I was raped. I was 16. I've never seen my dad react in such a primal, protective way before. He's the least violent person on the planet, but I actually thought he was going to go to the guy's house and kill him.

level 2
6.4k points · 10 days ago

I can’t even imagine what I would do if my daughter would tell me this. Your Dad sounds great just by reading this

level 3
[deleted]
3.8k points · 10 days ago

He's the best dad anyone could ask for. I don't know what I would do if either of my children said this to me either. Every parent's worst nightmare.

level 4
1.3k points · 10 days ago

Did the rapist got caught?

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level 1
3.2k points · 11 days ago

telling the ex that I don't see my future with her and I wanted to break up with her. I had, and still do have a lot of respect for her, and want the best for her. Knowing she loved me a lot more then I could love her made it feel like the right thing to do, but not wanting to hurt her feelings made this incredibly hard.

level 2

it's fucking tough man, but you did the right thing. and that person will respect you for it. People who can't be straight forward during a breakup make things so much worse. Often they think they're preventing pain, when almost always, they're making the situation confusing and that usually makes it worse for people. Being direct, and as kind as you can be about it, is the best way to do it. It's also your best shot at maintaining any sort of friendship.

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level 1
371 points · 10 days ago

Telling my husband, at almost 39 weeks pregnant, that we lost the baby.

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level 1
2.1k points · 11 days ago

Telling my ex girlfriend it was okay if we broke up and we could still be best friends even though I'm still just as in love with her as I always was and she's the one who says she just doesn't want to be in a relationship right now.

She said she didn't want anything to change between us and she still thinks of me as her soul mate, but it definitely doesn't feel the same. My heart breaks again every day and every conversation leaves me feeling depressed and lost.

Clean break ups where you end up hating the other person are so much easier.

level 2
682 points · 10 days ago

You need time away from them, you’ll never get over them if you’re still seeing them all the time or talking to them. Talk to them and say you need a couple weeks to your self, focus on yourself during that time and it’ll become a lot easier.

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level 1
19.6k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago
x3

I had to call my fiancee a week before our wedding that I had cancer.

Good news, happily married for four and a half years and about to make my five year cancer-free mark next May.

[EDIT] Holy CRAP this is ridiculous how much this blew up. First off thank you EVERYONE for the kind words. I'm stuck at work so I'm just now getting to this but it'll have to be quick. Totally my fault for bad phrasing.

Sometime mid February 2014: Go into some clinic because of a bronchitis flareup

March 1st 2014: Go back to small clinic because I could tell I had pneumonia from wheezing. Got a chest xray to confirm and there was a large mass at the top of my right lung. Plot twist: I DID have pneumonia as well. I went to two specialists same day and reached a rough diagnosis of advanced Hodgkin's Lymphoma. I called my fiancee and told her the blunt truth and she told me to come home. I arrived and she grabbed me by the shirt and told me, "we're getting married, so I'm getting you for at LEAST 50 more years. Preferably 70."

March 8th 2014: We got hitched and went on honeymoon

April Fool's day: offical diagnosis of Stage 3B Hodgkin's lymphoma

First treatment hit sometime in the last week of that April after testing and getting a port installed. So roughly beginning of May is what I consider the anniversary.

[EDIT 2]GOLD?! THANK YOU KIND PERSON!!!! [EDIT 3] Dear God, thank you for the second gold. And I want to thank everyone again for the awesome, kind words. You've all made my week!

level 2
3.0k points · 10 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Congrats!! 😁

Edit: on not having cancer of course. I'm so sorry that's not how my post originally came across.

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level 1

I was part of a d&d group and one kid was Really annoying. No one liked him and he was driving me crazy so one day I told him off.

“Look man, I asked around and literally no one here wants you hanging out. You do a, b, and c and everyone is just sick of it, please don’t come back.”

An hour later he came back and asked if he stopped doing a, b, and c if he could hang out again. I said yes and he got along well with everybody from there on out.

Telling him off was really nervous making but him coming back and acting like a genuine person was a real shocker.

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level 1

I was 19 when my father came flying down the stairs of the house into my room and jumped on my throat and starting screaming at me at 5 in the morning. After that he left the house and came back a few hours later trying to apologize. Mom ended up kicking him out of the house and I remember telling him that I don't want him in my life anymore and that I can't forgive him for what he just did and everything he did before in my life. I remember coming back inside and just losing my cool and crying for a good half hour about it. All this happened because I found his stash of meth and a pipe and asked my Uncle for advice on what to do about it. Dad found out and decided that jumping me while i was asleep was the best choice. Still the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life.

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level 1

Telling my Dad I had suicidal depression.

He sarcastically asked me what I had to be sad about, laughed, and walked away shaking his head.

I left that night, and got better. Our relationship has improved since then.

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level 1

In the course of my job (police) - I have had to deliver more death messages that I could count. It never gets any easier....

The worst was a elderly women who had died overnight. From the moment I arrived at the address the phone was constantly ringing....after an hour I had to answer (even though procedure is not too) as it obviously a loved one trying to get in contact.

I had to break the news over the phone to her daughter that she had died. She was hundreds of miles away....it was heartbreaking. She broke down and was sobbing. I told her I was with her Mum and would look after her. I told her to call me back when she was ready.

Her daughter (the granddaughter) called me back about 30 mins later. I explained what would happen and that they could contact me at anytime.

I understand d they came into the station a few days later. I wasn’t on duty so missed them. I wish I could have met them to pass condolences and just explain that I found her peacefully.

As all jobs - you get up’s and down’s. This was a down 😕

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level 1
28.8k points · 11 days ago
x2x3

Had to give the doctors permission to turn off my mom's life-support after she was declared brain-dead from a head injury

level 2
Original Poster8.7k points · 11 days ago

I can’t imagine what that feels like. Sorry you had to go through that.

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level 2

best thing you could do. imagine being lost in a coma that could feel like eternity and all you want to do is rest. pls mom if you are reading this pull my plug, or future kids.

level 3
1.5k points · 11 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Look into something called a living will. This, combined with a power of attorney that you have expressed your wishes too will ensure your desires if you should ever come to that unfortunate scenario. Don't make your loved ones decide, decide for yourself in advance.

Edit: Consult a lawyer for your local laws. I wasn't aware this isn't true for every state.

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level 1

"I want a divorce."

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level 1
7.0k points · 11 days ago · edited 10 days ago

My dad came into my room by complete chance literal seconds after I downed a glass of bleach when I was 14. I'd been trying to kill myself and when he smelled it and saw me quietly sobbing he ran over, blubbering and begging me to tell him what happened. I had to explain to my dad, my throat in agony and my heart hurting more, that I'd just drank bleach. I essentially had to tell my dad that I, his oldest child, barely into my teen years, was dying.
Edit- I'm doing ok now. It's been almost four years and yes, I am a female. Apparently drinking bleach made me more likely a female, and looking back all of my most serious attempts involved ingesting something. Thanks for all the upvotes too! It's weird logging into reddit with several thousand more karma than when you left.

level 2
Original Poster3.0k points · 11 days ago

Shit man. What happened after you told him?

level 3

I was rushed to hospital. After a week in hospital, I spent three months in a psych ward. I'd been out of school for months anyways due to mental illness and had just completed 10 weeks in a day program, and it wasn't my first attempt, so he managed to deal much more calmly than if it'd happened out of the blue.

level 4

But how are you doing now?

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level 1

I had to tell my parents that the reason I was in the hospital was because I attempted suicide. I tried to tell them it wasn't a big deal at first, but eventually my dad said "The doctor said you wouldn't be here if you hadn't done something to yourself. You can talk to me about anything." My mom wouldn't stop crying. My dad was so upset he wouldn't look at me. I love my parents more than anything and this broke my heart.

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level 1

I had to tell my dad that my son (his first grandchild) had cancer. ON MY DAD'S BIRTHDAY. He came to visit us at the hospital after my son had broken his leg (due to the bone tumor). He showed up with my brother right after we found out and I couldn't not tell them since something terrible was written all over my face. My brother and dad took care of telling my sister and mom for me.

Note: My son is doing great now and still spends lots of quality time hangin' with Papa.

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level 1

Telling my cheating boyfriend he had to leave for the last time. He was crying and saying he still loved me. It was the worst thing I've ever had to say because I didn't want him to go.

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level 1

I had to tell my boss that I made a $10,000 mistake.

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level 1
150 points · 10 days ago

I had to tell my sister her husband killed himself. They were in the process of a divorce and she was living with our parents and they got in an argument right before he did it. His parents found him in the woods the next day after he didn’t show up to work. His father blamed my sister and tried keeping her out of any funeral and memorial celebrations. 10 years later and they’ve never spoken a word to each other since.

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level 1

Telling the man I loved ( and probably still do) that we couldn't stay together. Love doesn't make everything goes right and sometimes we want things from life that are too different.
Two years after that he got marrried to someone that shared the same path as he does, and I was overjoyed, but it was also extremely painful

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level 1
285 points · 10 days ago

Had to call my brother and tell him our mom died. He went from "you're kidding, right?" to the most sad, mournful, screaming/sobbing I've ever heard.

I'll never forget that sound.

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level 1
3.7k points · 11 days ago · edited 11 days ago

I held my sick cat and told the vet to apply the euthanasia drugs. He died in my arms.

level 2

Same here, it happened last Friday. We miss him. How are you holding up?

level 3

It's getting better. I miss him at night when he used to curl up next to me on the couch. They are such great friends.

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level 1
269 points · 11 days ago

I had to turn my own mother away from my door, knowing her only other choice was to live on the streets. (There's not a lot of context here but I assure you I'm not heartless, it was the only safe choice at that point.)

level 2

It is alright; I believe you.

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level 1

Having to tell my dog we're not going for a walk when he pushes his head between the door frame and the door to watch me leave for work.

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level 1
1.7k points · 11 days ago · edited 10 days ago

Haven't said it yet, nor do I know if I will, but I really want to end my life long friendship with my childhood best friend. He has a horrible life, mostly from his own choices but tends to blame everyone else. He's an alcoholic and pothead and the last time I saw him (we live in different cities) he was drunk or high the entire weekend we spent together. I'm sadly his only actual friend though as he's surrounded by scum of the earth types and although he has a good heart, he doesn't realize that his actions aren't much better than those people.

He'd probably kill himself if I ended our friendship, as he's often suicidal anyways, so I likely won't do it of course, but god I just want to yell at the dude every time he calls to bitch about how everyone else is screwing him over.

Edit: I moved away several years ago and all I have to really do at this point is listen to his phone calls once a month and visit for a day when I go back once a year. For me that's worth him not killing himself as it barely affects me, I'm just tired of his bad decisions is all. If I still lived there, I would have put an end to it.

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level 1

Told the leaders of the cult my family had been in for thirty years that my brother and I were leaving.

Yeah, it didn't go well. One of them tried to cast a demon out of me, and they had our parents convinced we were going to hell. They and their kids (whom we had considered friends) spent hours at our house making all kinds of ridiculous accusations about me to my brother to try to turn us against each other (fortunately it backfired). It was late, and we just wanted to sleep at that point. They wouldn't leave until we had them convinced that we would stay.

Brother was actually considering it, but when I told him I was leaving with or without him by the week's end to go live with our cousin in another state, he shook off their manipulation and agreed to come with me. We left two days later. A year after that, our parents got out as well. Things are much better now.

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level 1

"It's okay, son. It's time to rest, my love. I love you." while I watch my infant son take his last breath.

level 2

This is the point where I stop reading through this thread

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level 1
870 points · 11 days ago

I had to tell my parents it was okay for them to put down my dog while I was stuck 2.5 hours away at college.

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level 1

Telling my kids that their mom had passed away. Not something I ever want to experience again.

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level 1

Had to tell my mom that my dad had finally died from his cancer. It's bad enough that a son should ever have to say that to his mother, but my mom was in the hospital fighting cancer of her own. After I said it, you could just see the light go out in her eyes. I knew I was going to lose her soon, and I did about 3 weeks later. Fuck Cancer.

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level 1
242 points · 11 days ago · edited 10 days ago

My girlfriend had to tell her pregnant best friend that her own mother slept with her fiancé/baby daddy.

*edited to try to clear up confusion.

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